Breakup with a FA - it’s crushing me

I just recently went through one of the most painful breakups of my life, and I’m struggling to understand and move on. I was in a short but very intense relationship with someone I deeply cared for. From the beginning, she gave me the impression that she wanted something serious. She even told me she wanted to take things slow so that we could make it work long-term. That made me feel secure and hopeful.

However, out of nowhere (or so it felt), she ended things, saying the relationship was “too much too quickly” and that she needed space to work on herself. She also mentioned that the relationship was overwhelming for her. This shattered me. It felt like she just threw everything we built together away in a single day.

Looking back, I realize she might have a fearful-avoidant attachment style. There were moments of deep connection, but also subtle signs of emotional distancing. I have an anxious attachment style, and I can see now how this might have created a push-pull dynamic in our relationship.

What hurts the most is reconciling her words about wanting a future with me and how much effort she seemed to put in, with her decision to walk away so abruptly. It feels like she manipulated me into believing this was going somewhere when it might have been doomed from the start.

Now, I’m stuck in this cycle of sadness, confusion, and replaying everything in my head. It’s hard to stop thinking about her, and I can’t shake the feeling that I wasn’t enough, even though I know this was likely more about her own emotional struggles.

Has anyone experienced something similar with a partner who was fearful-avoidant? How did you cope with the intense feelings of rejection, confusion, and loss? Any advice or perspective would be so appreciated.

Also I know that she is in therapy now and we are in no-contact until mid of January for gaining some insight and eventually for a new start in the next year. If she wouldn’t already be in therapy, I wouldn’t look back at all and move on, but this gives me hope in reconciliation and healing for the both of us. Is that stupid to think about?