5 days pp and the floodgates have opened
I cannot stop crying. It started bc I am concerned about my milk production—baby girl was born small at 5lbs12oz at 39 weeks (I had gestational diabetes) and she spent a few days in the NICU for hypoglycemia. My milk is maybe coming in, but it’s slow and I feel frustrated breastfeeding and pumping. So that started the crying. Next thing I know I’m crying bc I just gave birth and won’t see my ob for a while (do I feel particularly close to him? No lol). I’m crying thinking abt birth which on the whole wasn’t even that bad or traumatic. I’m crying thinking abt how much my parents love the baby. Crying about how much I love the baby. Crying thinking about how little sleep I’ll get tonight. My husband filmed me reading a book to her and I cried all the way thru. I don’t even feel particularly depressed or down…just weepy. We have to move to my parents next week for 5 days bc my building is replacing the boiler (I live in Chicago and we cannot have a newborn here without heat) and I just don’t want to be melting down over everything but maybe that’s just what this is right now. I do catch myself feeling panicked about leaving my old life behind even though this was a very much wanted pregnancy and child and then I feel guilty and…you guessed it, I cry about it. Please tell me this gets better.