Finding the "sexual intellectualism." My experience so far.

Hello. I want to discuss the things I have learned in my many years since becoming an adult, and how it's disappointing in many ways, and the way new behaviors and lifestyles are making many things worse. However, there are some ways society and communities are improving.

Growing up, the "adult world" always seemed more hardcore, while being professional and mature. You hear of the Playboy TV channel where they record naked women having interviews, you hear of fancy parties where people get kinky or busy. You watch HBO and see nudity depicted as this "essential and grown-up" adult thing that you have to be mature about to properly handle it and understand it.

Hitting adulthood, that was mostly a facade or a misunderstanding by me. People can be terrible, and often seek pleasure, mental rushes, and exploitation for the sake of exploitation.

For example, it seems nudity on TV has been about "tits because they're tits", and this mentality is shared by both the production team, and their audience. There often isn't any underlying theme to the nudity or sex. Often feeling like it's there just so more people are shocked to see it. However, that's not to say there isn't media where nudity is more thematically appropriate or important, but over the past 10 years it seems the nuance has been lost.

Even in regards to pornography. I myself am a massive fan of homemade porn, and some studio productions, but pornography has a community where people are ironically less mature and thoughtful than anywhere else. I understand that a lot of porn is about finding "wank material", but people obsess over the dopamine like kids buying pixie sticks. It's all "MORE MORE MORE YES YES YES!!!! TURN OFF BRAIN AND JERK IT TILL I DIE, WOMEN ARE OBJECTS AND MEN MUST BREED," like I could understand this being the way some people react, but it has become so much of what porn is.

I know the term "gooner" started as a joke, but it has literally become what most pornography is associated with. It's such a silly statement, I know, but I feel like we're losing "the intellectual" portion of ourselves lately. To me, I thought the adult life was more in the vain of David Lynch or Andy Warhol, but it's more like "what if the surface level is all that we ever know".

Even adults in the adult world are treated like objects and commodities. Go look at the major pornstars after they leave the industry. Almost the same story for many of them. No respect, no choices, no acknowledgement, and boundless expectations. Stories of the worst kinds of abuse. And these are adults working in a fairly big business.

Hearing my friends talk about their real-life, adult relationships... it reminds me of fake "high-school" relationships.

It's like everything I have known to be "adult" and "mature" is more childlike, unprofessional, and immature than I have ever imagined. Am I just seeing things wrong?

Media is fucked, adult relations are fucked, sexy erotic things are completely fucked. It actually seems a bit bleak to me.